A Long, Slightly Cynical yet Friendly Guide to Surviving Your PhD

The long quest for a PhD starts with the perils of finding a supervisor. Image created with DALL-E.

If you’ve ever found yourself wide-eyed at three in the morning, fervently typing “How do I survive a PhD?” into a search engine, trust me — you are not alone. The entire endeavor can feel like a bizarre mix of an endurance race, a puzzle game, and, occasionally, a soap opera starring you, your data, and your supervisor. Let’s dig into how to navigate these swirling waters, referencing some timeless wisdom from former PhD students, as well as the formal rules of good scientific practice established by institutions like the DFG (German Research Foundation). Don’t worry; despite the serious references, there will be a bit of humor and the occasional nudge of cynicism along the way — because, let’s face it, a little gallows humor is practically mandatory for any serious scientific pursuit.

1. The Quest for a Trustworthy Supervisor

Imagine you’re Indiana Jones hunting for hidden treasure. Except the treasure is knowledge (and maybe a three-year contract), and the booby traps are emails that go unanswered. Finding a good supervisor is as critical as finding the Holy Grail in an Indiana Jones movie — except your biggest danger might be an eternal wait for feedback rather than a collapsing temple.